Welcome to the Warrior Rose. I thought it appropriate to start at the very beginning, after all, that’s where we are. If you are joining me now, on this mid-September day, thank you for helping me on this journey as I (we?) figure out what this blog is and will be. For now, it’s just a concept, an idea, a blog on a web page, but, for me, it has been so much more for so long. It’s been an idea floating around my head. It’s been an escape to dream up something bigger than myself or my problems, no matter how big or small. It’s been an outlet, even before the words hit the page. TWR has been a virtual baby, many months in the making and you are reading the “birth,” if you will, of all that mental gestating.
Now, for the question I’m sure is floating around at least one mind out there, who am I? The answer, in short, is that I am no one. I’m just a wife and mama. I’m sure I cannot be the only woman to ever feel this way, but, too often, I feel that my family is my identity and that any identity I once had is long gone, washed away with the blood, sweat, and tears of childbirth. That is not to say that I am not still my own woman, but, so often I forget that I’m more than just a wife and mother….and, more accurately, I’m not sure what that means.
My husband is a saintly man. He not only puts up with me and has the patience of Job, he works hard to provide for our little clan and he treats me like a queen, even though I’ve never been the tiara-toting type. As far as the little army that makes me a mama, Little Warrior 1 is an adorable, newly minted first grader. Smart, independent, helpful, and full of spunk and love for all things in nature. Little Warrior 2 is my special little friend. Autism has touched our lives and colored it in ways I could never imagine. LW2 is marching to the beat of a drum most of us cannot see or hear, but, the tune is amazing and lifechanging. Order and logic are the framework of that special drum, but, there is so much more to it than meets the eye. Little Warrior 3 is a wildcard. If there is a mess to be made or cuddles to be had, LW3 volunteers as tribute. This one is the sweetest bundle of naughty I’ve produced. Last, but, most definitely not least is LW4. My Little Warrior 4 is a ham and LOVES people. I’m 100% sure LW4 gets this from me, because, my husband still has his love for people firmly in place and mine….well….my outgoingness has been MIA for some time….more like forever. Those four wrap up the list of beautiful babies I’ve had the privilege of birthing. They’re amazing, wonderful, beautiful, and mine, but, they do not complete our family. We also have more than twice as many angel babies we have not had the honor of meeting and will not get to, this side of Heaven. We’ve had the Judas Kiss of pregnancy and miscarriage more times than I’d wish on my very worst enemy, or anyone at all, but, I would not trade those days, weeks, months with my angels for anything. To feel a child grow under your heart, no matter how long or short that bliss may last, is the most awesome experience in the world.
Our brood resides in the midst of rivers and mountains and wildflowers and herds deer so comfortable with our small town that they’ll eat the flowers off your porch. Our little town, “the Villa,” is big enough to have a chain coffee shop, but, small enough not to have a “real” chain grocer. We host the county fair and horse races and the whole town steps outside to cheer on the teams from the local high school heading off to state. Old folks wave at every passing motorist from their front porch and neighbors help each other out for no pay but a hug or a warm plate of cookies. The Villa is our town.
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